Sometimes the best decisions happen at 5 AM when you can’t fall back asleep.
Remember yesterday’s post where I was ready to dust off my resume and run back to IC life? Well, turns out sleep deprivation and deep conversations with your spouse can completely flip your perspective.
Here’s what happened when I stopped spiraling and started actually thinking.
The 5 AM Clarity Moment ☀️
Yesterday I was all “Klaus is toxic, this role sucks, management isn’t for me.” But this morning, when I woke up way too early and couldn’t get back to sleep, something shifted.
Maybe it was the quiet. Maybe it was getting out of my own emotional headspace. But I started thinking: What if I’m quitting too soon?
It’s barely been a month. One. Single. Month. And here I am ready to throw in the towel because Klaus is being… well, Klaus.
The Wife Factor (aka Voice of Reason) 💭
I ran my internal debate by my wife over coffee, and she hit me with some hard truths:
“Give it 6 months. Maybe a year. Having PO experience will be massive for your career.”
“This stress you’re dealing with? It’s preparing you for bigger challenges. You want to be a CEO someday? You’ll face way worse than Klaus.”
Ouch. But also… she’s not wrong.
The Real Issue: Learning to Navigate Dysfunction 🎯
Here’s what really hit me during our conversation – part of my growth means learning to set better boundaries and manage up more effectively. Not because Klaus’s behavior is acceptable (it’s not), but because these are skills I’ll need regardless of where I go.
When Klaus drops impossible deadlines on me, I need to push back with data and alternatives instead of just stressing about meeting them.
When he asks for reports without proper training, I should be saying: “I need X, Y, and Z before I can deliver this properly” instead of struggling in silence.
When he schedules 1.5-hour rambling sessions, I need to say: “Let’s keep this focused – what are the three key decisions we need to make today?”
The growth isn’t about accepting Klaus’s dysfunction. It’s about protecting myself while building skills despite it.
The CEO Reality Check 🎯
My wife dropped another truth bomb: “You’ll face complex challenges and difficult decisions. Learning to set boundaries with dysfunction like Klaus’s will help you recognize and address these issues when you’re in leadership.”
She’s absolutely right. Every successful leader I’ve read about or met has stories about difficult people, impossible situations, and learning to navigate corporate politics.
But here’s the key distinction: Good leaders don’t normalize toxic behavior – they learn to manage around it while protecting their teams and themselves.
The New Game Plan: Smart Survival Strategy 💪
So here’s my pivot (and yeah, I’m using that PO term intentionally now):
The 1-Year Commitment
I’m giving this role one full year. Not one month of emotional reactions – one actual year of focused effort and strategic learning.
The Protection Strategy
And yeah, I’m going to start documenting everything and setting clearer boundaries. Not because I should have to, but because protecting myself while I grow is just smart strategy.
Every interaction with Klaus goes in writing. Every unreasonable request gets a professional pushback with alternatives. Every scope change gets confirmed via email.
I’m not normalizing his behavior – I’m strategically managing around it.
The Certification Strategy
Klaus wants me to get PO-Scrum and Project Management certifications? Fine. I’ll pursue them. Not because Klaus demanded it, but because these are actually valuable skills that will serve me regardless of where I go next.
The Technical Skills Addition
I’m going to learn Jira properly. Maybe it’s not coding, but it’s still a tool that’ll make me better at what I do. Plus, understanding the systems my developers use will make me a better PO.
The Business Acumen Focus
This role is teaching me things I’d never learn as an IC:
- Strategic thinking and prioritization
- Stakeholder management (even difficult ones like Klaus)
- Business decision-making under pressure
- Team leadership and communication
What I’m Actually Learning Here 📚
When I step back from the Klaus drama, here’s what this role is really giving me:
Skills I’ll use everywhere:
- How to translate business requirements into technical solutions
- Managing competing priorities with limited resources
- Building consensus across different teams and personalities
- Presenting complex information to non-technical stakeholders
Leadership lessons (including from bad examples):
- What NOT to do as a manager (thanks for the masterclass, Klaus)
- How to communicate clearly and concisely
- The importance of proper knowledge transfer and documentation
- Why setting realistic expectations matters
- How to protect yourself and your team from toxic management
The Long-Term Vision 🔮
Here’s how I’m reframing this entire experience:
If I go back to IC later, I’ll be a way better cloud security and cybersecurity professional because I understand the business side. I’ll prioritize security initiatives better, communicate more effectively with PMs and stakeholders, and understand how security fits into the bigger product picture.
If I stay in product/management, this Klaus experience is teaching me resilience, boundary-setting, and how to handle difficult personalities – all crucial leadership skills.
Either way, I win.
The Mindset Shift 🧠
Instead of “This is too hard, I should quit,” I’m shifting to:
- “How can I handle this situation more strategically?”
- “What boundary do I need to set here?”
- “How would a confident PO respond to this?”
- “What can I learn from this interaction while protecting myself?”
Klaus isn’t going anywhere. But my response to Klaus? That’s totally within my control.
What Changed My Mind 💡
Honestly? It was realizing that running away from difficult situations isn’t going to build the skills I need for where I want to go.
My billionaire CEO dreams (yeah, I said it) aren’t going to happen if I bail every time someone tests my resilience.
But the key is learning to navigate toxicity strategically, not just enduring it.
The Action Plan Moving Forward 📋
Week 1: Start setting clearer boundaries with Klaus. Document everything. Communicate expectations upfront.
Month 1-3: Pursue those certifications Klaus mentioned. Not for him – for me.
Month 4-6: Focus on building strong relationships with my development team and other stakeholders.
Month 7-12: Evaluate what I’ve learned and where I want to go next – with a full year of PO experience under my belt.
Real Talk: What This Means 🎯
Am I still frustrated with Klaus? Absolutely.
Do I think he’s a good manager? Hell no.
But am I going to let him derail my career growth? Not anymore.
This is me choosing to own my development while protecting myself from his dysfunction.
Your Turn: Ever Had a 5 AM Revelation? 🌅
Have you ever been ready to quit something, only to completely change your mind after sleeping on it (or not sleeping on it, in my case)?
What made you stick with a difficult situation that ended up teaching you valuable lessons?
Drop a comment below and let me know – I’m curious if anyone else has had these dramatic perspective shifts, and how you protected yourself while growing through tough situations.
Sometimes the best career advice comes from your spouse at 6 AM over coffee. Who knew?
Here’s to strategic growth, smart boundaries, and building the skills we need for where we’re going – even when the journey looks messier than we planned.
Until we meet again, Keep It Raw, Keep It Real! 😎✌️🔥
